Project Runway is an American reality television series on Lifetime Television, previously on the Bravo network, which focuses on fashion design and is hosted by model Heidi Klum. The contestants compete with each other to create the best clothes and are usually restricted in time, materials, and theme. Their designs are judged and one or more designers are eliminated each week.
Our Project Runway was on Saturday. The task was to buy me accessories to attend a wedding banquet. We had 3 hours in a mall with preferably a limited budget. And, the best part was I had my own Tim Gunn in tow. Timothy M. “Tim” Gunn is an American fashion consultant and television personality. I watched him on Jon Stewart once and have been hooked on to the show ever since.
A snippet from Tim Gunn’s “Guide to Style” show
I can hear you. Please let a girl have some life trying to interpret what the fashionable are wearing, even if she roams about in Jeans and Sneakers.
Since K had already loaned me a couple of dresses, I was not too keen on a dress, but more so on buying black sandals which should not be too gaudy, but shiny enough and at the same time comfortable with a perfect fit. With just the right heels. Neither too thin nor too thick. Suresh graciously accepted to accompany me , as I said, my own Tim Gunn. There have been times when Suresh just sat inside the car, refusing to enter a shop recounting all the bad experiences he had had as a shopping accompanist.
On Saturday, Partner being in good mood, helped with scouring various shops for the right shoes / sandals and we finally found one at Naturalizer. The one that I saw another girl trying out. With eager eyes, both me and Suresh were checking out from different angles to see if she was going to buy it or not, not knowing that there were lot more of the same make piled just a foot away..Yes, pathetic, thats me.
Feeling secured and happy on finding the right shoes,walked into BCBG (following the advice from my friend K, a self proclaimed fashion guru) , found a dress that fitted me well and within the budget that I had in mind. By now, Tim Gunn was morphing into Alton Brown. Yes, Suresh was already eying the Auntie Annie’s Pretzel.
For some more accessories, I walked into Victoria’s Secret, which felt like being received into your in-laws house as a new bride. So many secrets that one would have to unravel. I put down my right foot first, took a deep breath , smiled at the sales girl and started my comradeship with some dumb questions. Alton Brown was busy munching the pretzel ,deciding to let the secret be.
After 10 mintues, walked out with a tiny garment worth $50+tax. No, I am not kidding.Now you know what secret Victoria holds. A brand name and big bucks.
Feeling morose and cheated out of 50 bucks, I walked out of V and saw lingerie stores everywhere in the mall. Where were they all a moment ago, when I was desperately looking for them. Without further ado, I confirmed Suresh’s worst suspicions and wanted to run back to V to return the garment. By now, Alton Brown had morphed into devil with tiny horns, just growing.I pacified him to go to the car , ran to V, got my 50 bucks back and bought the same garment for $5 somewhere else. The fastest shopping one has ever done.
Yes, VANITY. Hits you when you reach mid-30s and makes you dress like a school girl.