You grow up. You are forced to work 9-5. You adapt and learn to co-exist with your peers.
You get married to the woman you love (hopefully,
You move to a new country. You adapt and learn to co-exist with your fellow countrymen.
You buy your first house,borrowing from others. You adapt and learn to co-exist with your mortgage.
You change jobs. You adapt to the hectic schedule and co-exist with your new bosses.
You move to a better neighborhood, a very nice house with a big yard. You just cannot adapt and co-exist with pooping,hole digging animals, can you???
Here, let me…..
We moved to one of the nicer, posh localities in the bay area, very close to the woods, where deers, raccoons, skunks co-exist with humans.
On the day we move,we see some poop in the lawn. Assume it to be the negligence of the previous owner who had a cat. Obviously, not the owner, but the cat. And clean it up. Alas!! the mysterious poop reappears, some mornings, with intervals every now and then.Partner investigates the yard and finds a gaping hole,under the fence that we share with a neighbor. In glee, fills the hole , assuming the neighbor’s two cats to be the culprit.
Score: The mysterios poop 0- Suresh 1
Just when you think that the sun and moon are perfectly aligned , favoring you, there it is again.. The poop. And the plot thickens. The hole gapes at you again. The situation calls for drastic measurements.. Partner finds some loose stones , cement slabs and slams them on the sand near the fence, waiting for the cat to give a try and thereby slam its head on the stone, all the while dreaming of a Tom & Jerry sequence, where Jerry pushes something very hard, huffing and puffing, only ,here it was Tom, presumably.
There it is.. again. Exact same spot. Happens somewhere between 11:00pm and 6:00AM. Looking at the poop size, a loud debate pursues.. Its a cat, no that cannot be..”I think it is a squirrel. The squirrels in this country are as big as a cat.” ” No, mom, squirrels are not nocturnal” . ” Could it be a raccoon, may be???” . ” But the hole is so small, how can a raccoon fit in there?”…” And raccoons can climb over fences, why dig?” A dire, messy situation. Drastic measures. . Scare tactics. Search, search. The internet god comes to rescue. It is called a scare crow. A motion sensing water sprayer. With sharp cones from one of our trees added as buffer in ..ahem.. the spot. Just when you think Suresh scores, there it is again, I mean the hole, not the poop. I guess we can give 0.5 to each at this point.
Score: The Unknown animal 1.5 : Suresh 1.5
Happy that he need not throw the poop any more, partner decides to spend his time building the fort under the fence. With stone slabs not being enough, a long wooden slab is bought and nailed to make the fence longer , leaving no space to dig, for the still unknown animal. As a dutiful wife, supporting the spouse in this game, I try to get a motion sensing camera from a friend and we fit it near the bedroom door. Rise and shine, run to the backyard, only to find a..!gasp! hole under the new slab of wood and all that the camera could catch was the sunrise and the motion of some trees.. tut tut…
Score : Mysterious,hole digging nocturnal animal 2.5 : Suresh 1.5
The puzzle continues. WTF??? The only way to find would be to do a matha ka jagran or celebrate shivarathri earlier/later ??? OR go to the neighbour and find out their take in this. The problem with housing in these locations, is that you cannot just holler over the fence without getting introduced first. Instead of a 1 second hello, I walk for 5 minutes to reach their front door as they share our fence in the back, which faces a totally different road. I meet Mr. R and ask him if his cats are the culprits or if it could be a !gasp! raccoon. He answers politely, “Oh! it is not a raccoon, it is a family of four! I saw them over the fence last night, around 11:30PM”. Cross my heart. A family of four frolicking in my back yard. “But Sir”, I ask, ” Why the hole??” . “That is what they do, lassie. They love to dig.” The hole was not the means to enter our yard, rather it was just peekaboo time for the family.I could almost hear the papa Raccoon admonishing the kids, “Enough of your peekaboo. Lets go , get some food. You kids can play some more while we come back to poop.”
Score: Raccoon Family 3.5 : Suresh 1.5
Partner fills the hole, religiously plugs in the scare crow every night and I refrain from stepping out of the house after 10:00PM. The score still stands the same , while we wait…one day the family will want to upgrade and move, just as we did from our old house..
“Hum honge kamyab, hum honge kamyab, hum honge kamyab ek din” ..
And, yes, you adapt and co-exist with raccoons..
PS: My attempt at using most of the emoticons in one post..