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Mothers

Dear Shoba,
How are you? We are fine here. Take your medicines regularly.Don’t worry about your exams. Eat well. It is boring here. We are eagerly waiting to see you.

All my mother’s letters had more or less the same format. When we were studying, there were no cell phones. Even STDs were a bliss. There was no phone in our hostel. We had to travel a few blocks and place a trunk call. Our college was on a hillock , very much away from the main city. The only medium of communication with parents was through inland letters or postcards. I have saved every single one of the letters I received during my college days, from mom,dad and sisters. Thanksgiving day seemed like the perfect day to browse all of them which brought back old memories.



I am a sister, wife, daughter but not a mother. When I started my career, I had plans of adopting a child and be a revolutionary single mother. But, life takes surprising turns and you follow the path that is laid out in front. Do I regret not being a mother? Maybe, sometimes,but definitely not enough to brood over it. I think a mother should first be a woman and then a mother. There are different kinds of mothers, the insecure , needy, protective, calm, strong,aggressive,impatient, but one feature that unites them all is their love for the offspring. Call it maternal instinct or womanly sacrifice, they do work a tad bit more towards their child’s care and I guess that makes them a bit possessive too. They don’t divide their love between children, rather multiply it.They may not make great mothers-in-law but they are always excellent mothers.


My mother is a woman first and I love her for just who she is. She might be outspoken, but the beauty in those angry words is that she speaks her heart and is not a hypocrite. She is very practical and calls it as she sees it. She accepts and says that her children studied and came up in life on their own with her duty being they were well fed and clean. Sometimes, I feel it is a thankless job as the children might take it as a norm .


My mother was married at an early age, just one day before she turned 18 and has been cooking food every single day ever since. I have been cooking, maybe not every day, for the past 10 years and I am already exhausted. Imagine doing that for 48 years without a break. Yes, tomorrow is her 66th birthday and I wish I were with her .


When I was in college,my trip to hostel consisted of pulikachal(puliyogare mix),menthiyada hittu(dhal powders),pickle,dates with honey and other snacks. Things have not changed much now. I bring seven different varieties of spice mixes on my trip from India. All homemade, thanks to my mom.


My eldest sister is going through a tough phase with her health and mom goes to temple every single day. When my other sister had tough times, every single call was filled with her news. When I was diagnosed with chronic renal failure, the mother in her readily accepted to donate her kidney which has given me a new lease of life though the woman in her was actually frightened. Mothers become strong when their children need them.


Most mothers all over the world are the same. Every one will have similar stories about their mother. What better day than thanksgiving and my mother’s birthday to salute all the mothers and a special salute to my dear mother.

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Posted by on November 26, 2009 in General

 

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Birthday Wishes

shoba_86

It was 2000 July and we were visiting Universal Studios at LA. While the three of us went for the “Back to the Future” ride, he waited outside and to my surprise, gifted me with this bracelet when we came back.He might have forgotten but I remember and preserve it till this date.I am a sentimental goof when it comes to gifts and this is special because I love him so much.

When I was 10, he surprised me with a movie after a doc’s visit, “Digby, the biggest dog in the world”. We rode on the bicycle all the way from home to the doctor and on to the theater.

Till I was 9, he used to give me piggy-back rides after a tiring day at work. Anything for the brat.

I was physically eve-teased for the first time in my 8th grade, when I ran home and waited for my best friend to come back from work to pour it all out. He took leave the next day and followed me to school and back without my knowledge just to make sure I was safe.

I fell ill with Measles in 10th grade and he took leave of absence, just to carry me around the house and look after me.

In my 2nd year of college, when there was a major bus strike with me traveling and was supposedly missing , he panicked , started his search and gave me the biggest hug and kiss on finding me after an interval of 7 hours. According to the driver, ” Sir. azhudhu naan innikidhan parthen.”( I am seeing him cry for the first time. )

He spent all his time planning for his three daughters’ education,sacrificing luxury,making sure we get the best and be independent in this wide world. A man very content with life and who finds happiness in small things and goes out of his way to help others. He was recognized as one of the best senior citizens in our vicinity.On the first Sunday of every month, he wakes up at 6:00 , ready to go to the free clinic , which is organized by their Welfare Association and gets busy in volunteering doing registration, blood tests for people younger than him.:-)

Yes, That’s my dad. A man full of energy, enthusiasm and epitome of service.

Happy 76th Birthday , Dad !
-From all of us.

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Posted by on November 4, 2009 in General

 

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